Political Satire

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Dec 3

‘Strikers Ought to Be Shot’

On Wednesday November 30th, tens of thousands of employees of the public sector picked up their metaphorical pitchforks and marched into the streets of Hampshire.

The government once again did what they do best. Piss of the public by cuts and reforms that only benefit the politicians’ own wallets. I’m sure they won’t need to reach too deep into their pockets when they start getting paid their pensions.

Meanwhile, the public will have to pay more and work longer. Why care about pensions anyway? With how it’s going nowadays, you’ll probably be dead before you actually reach the end of your working years.

The lack of teachers at about two thirds of schools probably earned a passionate approval of the students of all ages. Isn’t it nice how the younger generation cares for pensions? For free speech and passive aggressive blackmail of the government? Not having to attend classes probably helped too.

According to the poll by the Southampton’s local newspaper Daily Echo, 48% supported the strike while 49% were against it. The 49% were probably people jealous of not having a day off. It is somewhat reassuring that only 3% did not know enough about the issue to decide.

Considering the ‘uninformed’ most likely spend their time procrastinating on a social media instead of picking up a newspaper from time to time, 3% isn’t too outrageous a number. Good to know Southampton has not been abducted by utter obliviousness yet.

Speaking of obliviousness, if it were a political regime, Jeremy Clarkson would without a doubt be the PM. The presenter of BBC’s Top Gear very colloquially stated about that strikers: “I would have them taken outside and executed them in front of their families.”

Clarkson’s anti-protest statement was followed by his apology. It was a joke, apparently. I’m not one to get offended by a random ‘comedian’, but it is logical to see how that would alienate a large chunk of his viewers.

Why would Clarkson care anyway? It’s not like the fees those same exact viewers pay plump up his paycheck. Then again, if I earned about £1 million a year, I wouldn’t care either.